They want a heatwave???

Oh my goodness, Californians crack me up!

So, yesterday I am sitting on the beach with some friends....not a cloud in the sky....a perfect 78 degree August day.....the beach was empty and I do mean empty, like practically 'have it to ourselves' kind of empty.....the waves were beautiful and the sun was shining when the talk turned to the weather.

Everyone started complaining about the fact that it was such a mild summer and that we just didn't seem to have more than one week of really warm weather. I laughed and said that, coming from Texas where you could go 90 days in a row never dipping below 100 degrees, I was going to go on record as saying that I couldn't believe they were complaining about not being hot enough.

One of my dear friends said, "Yes, but this is California and we expect perfect weather!"

You crazy Californians.....THIS IS PERFECT!!!!! Have you people lost your minds???? The rest of the world is running their air conditioners like mad, praying they don't break down and trying to figure out what bank they are going to have to rob to pay the electric bill. They are dumping ice in their pools to cool them off. They are buying those little spray mister thingys so that they can walk to their mailboxes without passing out. They can not risk walking barefoot for fear of literally burning the skin off of their feet.

God, if you read my blog (which I'm guessing is not so much the process of "reading" it as just "knowing" what it says) please, please, please don't listen to all those other Californians who are asking for heat. Ignore them and leave us with the perfect weather that they just don't seem to know is perfect.

Oh and God, if you are listening.....could you also lower the real estate prices around here and maybe talk to that big ugly spider who keeps making the biggest web I've ever seen on my back porch and ask him to stop. Okay? Thanks